Next time on "Dinky the Bachelor"

My wife and kids went to her mother's house this morning. I have to work tomorrow afternoon so I had to stay. I have the house all to myself...let's see...what should I do first? I think the first thing will be to stuff a pork roast with garlic and sundried tomatoes, and put it with some little red potatos in the crock pot for a few hours. Wild huh? She hates pork roast, especially when I cook it because I love spices and she likes plain food. Man! am I gonna live the high life tonight. I might even get a two-liter of soda and drink it straight from the bottle.